April 11 2007

I was just watching a stand-up comedy by this one guy on Comedy Channel.

And I couldn't help but to think that I have a hard time justifying statements just like this one he just made; "maybe if I'd obeyed more, maybe if I'd done more good, God wouldn't have let this happen to me."

Coincidentally, I'm also reading a book called, "Why Bad Things Happen to Good People" by Harrold S. Kushner, in which the author deals with the issues along the same line as this.

I sympathize and morn with those who morn about their trageties and hardships. It sucks to have terrible things happen to you..But I still have a problem with our measurement of God by OUR standard. I just have a problem with the thought process expressed in the comedian's statement, and with those who cannot justify God's existence for reasons as such; "life is not fair, God shouldn't let bad things happen to good people, why do bad people go unpunished? It's not fair. That's why I don't believe in God."

I can totally see why they'd think that way, and again, I sympathize with them.

BUT, I have a problem with such views that portray God as our school teacher or a nursery worker.

If indeed we performed good deeds only for the reason of good things being returned to us, then, I'm not sure if it'd be described as purely "good deeds".

Our perception of both good things and bad things are so warped that I feel as though what the general public thinks is deserving of our deeds is just not justifiable to me.


For example in the U.S., I feel as though people often associate a loss of luxury or comfort as a terrible event.

Is it?

I'm not sure if it is that "bad".


In my life, I can truly say that the best of me has come out of absolutely the worst case scenarios. Not that I wish for them in every minute of my life, but they sure have been the greatest wake-up calls in the past. I would often start to challenge, re-evaluate, and re-shape myself out of these unfavorable conditions. It's never easy, and it's never pleasent going through it, but it's true. They have been the greatest growing times.

On the other end, I have also been blessed with many, many "good" things...anything from financial securities to mindful, intelligent, talented friends to great health to this independent lifestyle of mine. Those are all great things for which I'm always thankful.

However, once I would start to place my focus on protecting these...once I would start to measure my values according to how comfortable I am...once I would start to place my identity in these, I always became complacent, prideful, and undisciplined, but by far the worst of all, became frustrated with EVERYTHING I was doing, and I could never figure out why.


I'm sure it was because earthly things are unsatisfying at the end.

Persuit of "good life/good deeds" = God AUTOMATICALLY rewarding us with "good things" does not equal right perception of truly just, caring God in my mind.


I think true God is bigger than that very human logic of ours.


If that is our view of God, then, I must say that he's not anywhere near perfect. God that our minds have made up according to our measurement of what is good and bad is not anywhere near the type of God I would like to follow and worship.


I'm not sure if we can reach God by ourselves on our own strengths...

I tried to reach Him by performing "good deeds", truly believing these things would be returned to me in 10 folds.

I did that for years and years...but it only let to misery and confusion at the end.

Our good deeds doesn't guarantee anything. Our daily occurances do not and cannot reflect the true nature of God the all-mighty that I believe and want to believe in.

I really think our perception of what is good and bad is warped...so you can't judge God from that.

And that's why I have a hard time with statements as such.